A call for more government holidays

This morning’s Columbus Day commute proves that we have too many government bureaucrats in Austin, Texas. The drive was a breeze. I’d estimate we had 35% fewer automobiles on the highway.

I propose we encourage our politicians and their staffs to stay home. Think of all the benefits. If they aren’t in office, they can’t pass more inane legislation. They can’t waste our tax dollars on idiotic programs. They can’t pander to the power brokers behind the scenes who really control the strings.

Yes. It is time for our government to act more responsibly by not acting at all. Do us all a favor. Stay home. Not only will your magnanimous inaction keep from driving your constituents insane, but it will make our drive to work so much more pleasant.

del.icio.us Tags: Columbus Day,politicians,commute to work

I heard the news today

This was no April Fool’s joke, although Austin citizens wish it were so. All day long we kept hearing news of serious injuries and death from all parts of the city.

The headlines in this morning’s online edition of the Austin American-Statesman:

Austin police investigate South Austin injury shooting 6:09 a.m.

Man in critical condition after being struck by pickup truck 10:44 p.m. Sunday

Man dies after falling 50 feet near Pennybacker Bridge 10:44 p.m. Sunday

Woman dies after being hit by boat near Mansfield Dam 8:25 p.m. Sunday

Skydiver killed outside Lexington 7:40 p.m. Sunday

APD seeks suspected hit-and-run driver 12:57 p.m. Sunday

What the heck is going on in Austin Texas? This is a magnificent place to live people.  Be safe and take care of one another. Okay?

del.icio.us Tags: April Fool's,news,headlines,Austin American-Statesman,hit-and-run,death

Mary Ann? Or Ginger-O’s?

I’m not a cookie monster, but Newman’s Own Ginger-O’s are probably the best mass produced cookies I’ve ever tasted. They have a wonderful snap and the ginger flavor just bursts across your taste buds.

They are so good! You just have to try them. Pour yourself a fresh glass of cold milk and savor each bite. Exquisite.

Oreo, you are being served notice: I may have found a new favorite packaged cookie.

While pricey at $5.99 for a 13 ounce package, they are worth the occasional indulgence…maybe more than occasionally.

del.icio.us Tags: Mary Ann,Ginger,Gilligan's Island,Cookie Monster,Sesame Street,Newman's Own Ginger-O's,cookies,milk,Oreo,Nabisco,writing,copywriter,blogger,blogging

The Super Bowl goes commercial

If I had a DVR, I’d record the Super Bowl so I can replay the broadcast whenever I’m bored.

I’d fast-forward through the game play and watch the commercials.

LiveJournal Tags: Super Bowl commercials,television advertising,tv commercial,copywriting,precision in communication,social media writer,copywriter,blogger

Prettying up the workout

I’m working out, bench presses at the moment. Never thought I’d be staring at a beautiful orange hibiscus bloom while doing my reps.

How’s that, you ask? An orange hibiscus bloom hanging over your bench? Where are you working out, in a plant nursery?

 

Close, but no.

 

My garage is my gym. It’s 40 degrees at 4:00 p.m. in Austin Texas with a bitter north wind that makes you think you’re in Chicago. Tonight’s low is forecast to dip to around 19 degrees. I moved all of my potted plants into the garage. I have to protect them from the hard freeze.

 

Maybe that’s all my garage gym ever needed was some plant life to bring it some cheer and make my workouts more enjoyable.

 

Then again, maybe not. The garage makes for one ugly gym.

 

del.icio.us Tags: working out,pumping iron,lifting weights,bench presses,gym,health club,hibiscus plan,plant nursery,garage,Austin Texas,hard freeze

Car talk that only scratches the surface

Ding is on my list of least liked words. It connotes minor damage, a dent or a blemish. To me, it means some inconsiderate dolt parked too close to my vehicle and whacked my door while exiting their own chariot. 100 out of 100 times, they leave without even the courtesy of a note of apology on my windshield. What’s up with that?

A buddy and I were talking last week about why my daughter’s Toyota Camry is in the body shop. I explained how she learned the bitter lesson that immobile objects truly are immobile and can do considerable damage to a vehicle, even while driving in reverse. I backed into a support beam in a poorly lit parking garage a few years ago. I wasn’t going more than two miles per hour, so the impact merely left a small crease in the bumper. It still ticks me off! It’s pride in ownership.

I purchased a 2002 Volvo in May 2010. The body was in remarkable condition with nary a blemish. I’m sure the car was buffed by the dealer prior to putting it on the lot, yet still, I was very impressed with its condition. Friends and admirers congratulated me on the purchase of our “new” ride (it had 112K miles on the odometer). Eleven months later, it has a least a half-dozen dings and one moderate dent – all caused by anonymous turds who felt no responsibility for their actions. The most recent is a pretty good dent high up on the front passenger door. It galls me every time I look at it.

A friend remarked that he finds it a relief when his new ride finally gets its first ding. When it happens, he no longer concerns himself with where he parks. It’s already nicked up, so what’s the point getting all stressed out about where I park and inconveniencing myself in a futile effort to protect it? I understand his thinking, but it upsets me nonetheless. We resign ourselves to the notion that others will essentially vandalize our cars with not a care, a bit of remorse or a tinge of guilt. What does that say about our society?

43 Things Tags: automobiles,cars,Toyota Camry,Volvo,new car,used car,auto body shop,personal responsibility

Romancing the reader

For a recent writing exercise, the assignment was as follows:

In three sentences, “romance the reader" with the following words: desire, connection, magnetism, attraction, envy, power, indulgence.

Here’s what I wrote:

I have an insatiable desire to form a connection with you that transcends a simple magnetism or attraction. I want to make it so real, so strong, that it is the envy of all who observe. The power of this bond is their inescapable indulgence, like the unintentional voyeur who stumbles across lovers in a secluded outdoor rendezvous and can’t peel her eyes away from the steamy amorous scene.

Whew! Where’s the fan? Maybe I missed my calling as a romance novelist.

43 Things Tags: writing assignment,desire,connection,magnetism attraction,envy,power,indulgence,insatiable,bond,voyeur,rendezvous,amorous romance novelist

Oh, oh, listen to the music at SXSW

I spent two glorious days at South by Southwest, better known in print by its acronym, SXSW, at some free concerts. On Thursday, March 17, the venue was Maria’s Taco Xpress for The Ruby Stardust Lounge, presented by Sweet Relief Musician’s Fund and Ruby James. There’s nothing like sampling sounds from multiple bands without ever leaving your seat. It’s almost like speed dating. You get just enough face time to get a sense of the band’s personality, style and voice, then they move on and another group takes the stage. While most were attractive and appealing, my three favorite performers were Deadman, Randy Weeks, and Ruby James.

On Friday, March 18, I did the moving around, paying a visit to three venues. The day started at Opal Divines Freehouse on 6th Street at around 1: 15 p.m. Rice Moorehead Band was in the middle of their set as I grabbed a table and ordered a Buried Hatchet draft (love that stout from Southern Star Brewery in Conroe, TX). I didn’t get to focus much on them, but what I heard was good. Next up was Horse Opera, a country band from the honky tonk mecca of the south, none other than Austin, TX. I’m not a country music regular, but this group made you take notice with their sound and their vocals. Next up was a newly-formed band, Both Feet. Fronted by two artists from Anchorage, the fellas were playing together in public for the first time. The group is composed of veterans of the live music scene and that experience evidenced itself in their performance. What a sound! As these guys coalesce and expand their repertoire, they’ll only get better and their reputation and followers will grow.

After Both Feet completed their set, I walked up 6th Street to The Belmont. Sponsored by Nokia, a sizable stage on the ground level was the platform for Vanguard Records acts. I had the thrill of seeing well-known Austin band The Gourds. What fun to watch these guys live for the first time. They sure know how to entertain. Next up was Matt Nathanson, a favorite amongst the ladies. Talk about understanding how to work the crowd, Matt loves to tell stories using the most colorful language. It wasn’t a smattering of f-bombs, it was more like a blitzkrieg. His fans loved it though, and he rewarded everyone with an energetic short set of selected hits interspersed with new songs. He promised to return to Austin soon for a full concert, which delighted the crowd.

I closed the day with a return to Maria’s Taco Xpress for the express purpose of seeing Deadman again. It was SRO as Shurman belted out their Austin flavor of rock-n-roll with a strong country undertone. A palpable energy consumed the crowd as Deadman took the stage. These guys are gifted singers with complex and rich harmonies that wow the ear. Their music is their own and it is original and compelling. As musicians, these boys can play with a verve and skill that enthralls.  Do yourself a favor and listen to Ain’t No Music.  There’s a rich and urgent energy in the ballad that compels. It draws you in and holds you rapt until the last hushed chord gently releases you. I love that song!

Two days, sixteen bands. That’s SXSW. You have to see it, hear it and be it to appreciate it in Austin, Texas, the undisputed Live Music Capital of the World.

del.icio.us Tags: South by Southwest,SXSW,Maria's Taco Xpress,Sweet Relief Musician's Fund,Ruby James,Deadman,Randy Weeks,The Trishas,The Blue Bonnets,Carter/Doster/Sexton,Anne McCue,The Mastersons,The Last Dancers,Thomas Wynn and the Believers,Jon Dee Graham and the Fighting Cocks,Opal Divines Freehouse,Rice Moorehead Band,Southern Star Brewery,Horse Opera,Both Feet,Shurman,Austin Texas,Live Music Capital of the World

Put on a happy Facebook

I’m a purist. I prefer to see Facebook remain a social network. A place where friends gather to share daily life experiences and reminisce. It is dismaying to see the site being hijacked by people with agendas. I resent having their points of view foisted upon me via wall postings day after day.

The three subjects to avoid in polite company, at work and at cocktail parties; politics, religion and sex, should also not be discussed on Facebook.

I do not want to read political statements. Keep your political ideology to yourself. 

I do not want to read religious statements. Keep your belief system to yourself.

I do not want to read statements on sex. Keep your attitude, orientation and stereotypes to yourself.

Let’s add a couple of more to the list of topics to avoid:

I do not want to read special interest group statements. Keep your position on right-to-life, right-to-die, gun rights, global warming, immigration, unions, and entitlement programs to yourself.

I do not want to read conspiracy theory statements. Keep your paranoid peculiarities to yourself.

All are polarizing and bring out the worst in people. We have become such an intolerant citizenry. There can be no civil discourse. Objectivity is lost. Decorum is tossed to the wind. Decent people become indecent.

What other behaviors on Facebook drive me nuts?

I do not want to see links to articles on my wall. I don’t go to Facebook to keep current on international, national or local news. I have RSS feeds from sites that deliver the content that interests me.

I do not want to see “If you blah, blah, blah, then copy and repaste this to your wall” requests. These are equivalent to spam email messages. Stop it!

I do not want to see App Requests. I don’t trust them and I don’t want to share my Facebook profile information with unknown third party software developers.

So, let’s stay with the safe subjects. Let’s talk about our children, puppies, and/or kittens. Let’s share our vacation stories, recipes and our favorite music. Let’s revisit surviving monster storms, Spring Break and epic roadtrips. Let’s recall our favorite high school teachers, sweetest dates and class reunions.

And pictures. Don’t forget the pictures.

del.icio.us Tags: Facebook,politics,religion,sex,special interest groups,conspiracy theories,paranoia,RSS feed,App Request,reminisce,vacation,recipes,music,Spring Break,roadtrips,high school,class reunion

Oh, I wish I were an Oscar award winner…

…that is what I’d truly like to be,
Cause if I were an Oscar award winner,
I could swear like a sailor on TV.

What’s up with the Melissa Leo dropping the f-bomb on national TV? And how is it that an entertainment reporter thinks it’s great in the post show media interview? Ridiculous. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if celebrities politicians, business executives, professional athletes and others in the public eye returned to the days when folks conducted themselves with class, dignity, integrity, self-respect, and a sense of decorum?

Hey, one has to have dreams.

My favorite Academy Award moment? Kirk Douglas, without question.

My second favorite moment? Every occasion Anne Hathaway returned to stage in a new ensemble and my daughter yelled “How many times is she going to come out in a new dress? Gah!”

My third favorite moment?  The PS22 Chorus from from Public School 22 in Graniteville, Staten Island performing Somewhere Over the Rainbow to close the 83rd Academy Awards show.

del.icio.us Tags: 83rd Academy Awards,the Oscars,Melissa Leo,Kirk Douglas,Anne Hathaway,James Franco,PS22 Chorus,Public School 22,Oscar Mayer weiner song

Things I’d like to see…

On the road:

Headlights at dawn and dusk – it isn’t about what you see; it’s about being seen.

Turn signals blinking – they’re not optional equipment and it’s always good to know the driver’s intent.

Everyone buckled in, especially children.

Both hands on the wheel.

Drivers using the hands-free capability on their cell phone.

No texting while driving!

Bicyclists respecting the rules of the road. Motorcyclists = ditto.

All items secured on trailers, in pickup truck beds and tied to the roof.

No tailgating!

No driving buzzed or under the influence.

Someone under 60 driving over 60 in a Crown Victoria.

No 15 year-olds behind the wheel. They aren’t ready (even if you are).

More teenagers in sedans and cool retro muscle cars. These are the vehicles for you, not SUVs and pickup trucks.

Not a cigarette butt in sight.

del.icio.us Tags: driving,turn signals,tailgating,texting,DWI,MADD,seatbelts,buckle up

Hear no Evil

I haven't heard a single political ad leading up to this election. Oh, I know they're on the radio and television with ever-increasing frequency as November 2 nears. I just don't listen to them. I figure the politicians and wannabe's deserve the same treatment they give us.

What's up, Doc?

Aw, this diwectow is stawting to wub me the wong way.

Windows to a whole new world

I ushered in the new year installing Windows 7 on my daughter’s and my laptops. Yes, I’m a glutton for punishment.

 

My daughter’s laptop qualified for a free upgrade because we bought it in September 2009. Windows 7 was released two months later. Not wanting to risk losing any critical data, or the vast music library she owns, I followed best practices and performed a backup to CDs. This is a pretty straightforward process, or so I thought. I started the backup at 2:23 p.m. on Saturday, January 2. Nine hours later, as I was watching The Hangover, backup disc #23 in hand, the backup fails.

 

No way! What the heck happened? An IO failure is what happened. Now what? Do I start over? I don’t think so. I finish watching The Hangover (very funny!) and go to bed.

 

First thing Sunday morning, I pour a cup of coffee and get back to business. I insert the Windows 7 DVD, select Upgrade, and pray. Surely this will be a simple, intuitive and flawless procedure with no unrecoverable errors, correct?

How could I ask that question after the backup fiasco? Well, what can I say, I’m an optimist.

 

In just under 3 hours, the installation completed with virtually no intervention required. The system booted, files and programs were present, and only Norton Internet Security wouldn’t function. Success? Apparently yes, because my daughter has used the computer every day since and she has found no problems.

Buoyed by that experience, I decided to tackle my three-year-old laptop that Sunday afternoon. Since my laptop was running XP, I had to do a custom install of Windows 7, which means all applications are wiped out. Microsoft strongly recommends backing up all data or risk losing it forever. Uh-oh, not again!

On the Windows 7 install DVD is Windows Easy Transfer, a program created to facilitate data backup. The application provides you the option of doing a full system backup to a network device or DVDs. I choose the latter. The backup starts and I walk away. The application writes the file to a temporary folder on the laptop hard drive first. Two hours later, I have a 37 GB file I expect will start writing to the DVDs. I’ve labeled discs 1, 2 and 3 and I’m ready to feed the drive after each disc becomes full.

I wait. Nothing.

I search the menus of the application. There is no “Write Windows Easy Transfer Files to DVD” command.

I wait some more. Nothing.

I figure I did something wrong, so I delete the 37 GB file and start over. I pay very careful attention to each instruction step. When the backup process launches, I leave the room. Two hours later I return and discover I have a 37 GB file on my hard drive that will never by written to DVDs.

I give up. Important files are copied to thumb drives. Everything else I put at risk. Let the Windows 7 custom install begin! More prayers.

Just like the Upgrade install, once the process starts, I can walk away (and I do). I check periodically and see the install is progressing. Three hours later, it’s complete.

My initial system test made it crystal clear a custom Windows 7 install from XP requires several more steps to get the laptop functional again. No Bluetooth! I need drivers! I had to establish an ethernet connection to perform a Windows Update. Once the drivers and other updates were installed, I had my wireless connection and a functional laptop running Windows 7. Pretty cool.

Next, I had to re-install the applications (remember: custom install deletes all programs). While that was time-consuming, it all came off without a hitch.

Three days later the laptop is performing beautifully. I’m still in awe that I suffered no data loss. All-in-all, I’d have to say the Windows 7 install for both laptops was not a bad experience.

 

Technorati Tags: Windows 7,Upgrade to Windows 7,Windows Vista,Windows XP,Windows Easy Transfer

2010: The Year of the Optimist

Thank goodness 2009 is coming to a conclusion. I dub it "The Year of Pessimism". So much negativity flowed from all directions. I'm tired of it. Aren't you?

Will our outlook improve in 2010? Will economic growth accelerate? Will employers start hiring the thousands of highly-skilled and intelligent talent currently sitting idle and seeking meaningful and challenging work?

Since so much of what drives our economy is psychological, let's all think positive in 2010.

Happy New Year!

Sportcasters as Linguists

Heard on Monday Night Football:

"Boy, on that drive all they did was go backwards."

Should you dub it "a drive" when the net gain was a loss?

Perhaps "Boy, on that possession all they did was go backwards." would have been a more apt description.

I realize my standards may be too high when it comes to sports broadcasters. No longer will you hear a mellifluous description of a game as if the action on the field were a work of art unfolding right before your eyes (or ears). Unfortunately, like academic achievement in high schools across the United States, we are lowering our standards. Now you hear street slang on the air waves from sports announcers who can barely express an original thought in a complete sentence. Many descriptions of the play are cliches.

Such is the life of a sportscaster.


Someone help me here: is the plural form of backward proper grammar? Seems to me backward is a direction.

Green with Envy

People have accused me of being green all of my life. Suddenly, that's a good thing.